this will serve as my live tweet thread for Apple's "Awe Dropping" event

[Guest]

Danke :3

who has this cute language and how do i kiss em

[Guest]

I really hope these ones actually fit more people's ears, my grandma was given a pair of Airpods Pros for her birthday for the hearing aid feature, we can't get it to recognize her ear shape.

[Guest]

oh cool they're talking about fitness, lemme go microwave some pizza rolls rq

[Guest]

Airpods Pro 3 will offer the ability to listen to music

[Guest]

i know we're all thinking it, no one care about these guys near-death experiences. there, i said it for you

[Guest]

would you actually... be able to read what this says from a glance?

[Guest]

seeing the jet black apple watch just makes me wish they still made jet black iphones

[Guest]

this year's apple watch will be able to tell time

[Guest]

i cant imagine wanting to listen to anything like a podcast from my apple watch, i cant imagine using my speakers on anything either LOL

[Guest]

my dick is the largest it's ever been on me

[Guest]

iPhone 17 is kinda cute, finally has ProMotion? Did previous base line iPhones? I forgot ;-;

[Guest]

finally, blast processing

[Guest]

@vozercozer "thinnest ever" fuck off actually I want a big ass watch on my wrist
gshock 4 lyfe

[Guest]

10 minutes of charge gives you 8 hours of video playback?

[awoo@gts.apicrim.es]

@novenary @vozercozer fr!! i'd rather have thicker devices than to deal with mediocre battery life lmao

[Guest]

uhhhh how do you know that Ms. Privacy That's Apple?

[Guest]

@awoo @vozercozer real as fuck for phones but i won't be caught dead buying a """smart""" watch lol

[Guest]

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[awoo@gts.apicrim.es]

@novenary @vozercozer the only kind of smarter-than-a-gshock-watch i'd be interested in are pebbles, and maybe, just maybe ones where you can just have whatever you'd like in terms of firmware on it (while still having a much better battery life than whatever apple and pixel watches (which are just phones on a wrist nowadays, really) can reach)

[Guest]

i hate being that asshole but i've never been this unexcited for an iphone in my entire life.